It always happens in the strangest of places. When I least expect it my daughter and I will have a conversation of great importance; a teaching moment about what I believe, about what I feel is my parental and human duty to instill in my young. On Friday night it happened while waiting in line at the drive thru of a McDonald’s.
Without thinking it through I mentioned the three day weekend ahead, and all of the fun we were going to have together (to make up for the fact that I was going out that night).
“Why is there no school on Monday?”
“We have a holiday on Monday.”
“What holiday is it?”
“We are celebrating the birthday of a great man whose name was Martin Luther King Junior.”
“Why?”
How is it possible that I have not learned by now that this line of questioning would follow a simple statement about a holiday? What followed was an impromptu history lesson, as best I could, about the state of our country a mere fifty years ago. I explained to her that people with different skin color were not treated the same, that Dr. King spoke to many people about why this was wrong and called for equal treatment for all. Most importantly, we discussed that though we may look different on the outside, we are all people who deserve to be treated the same.
But afterwards I worried about this conversation.
Could I do damage by pointing out that people were not always treated the same because of their skin color; a thought that would never have occurred to her in the first place? It was with purpose that I did not explain to her which skin colors were treated poorly. Still, wow. I’m going to question how I handled this entire conversation for a very long time.
Oh, then the even harder questions came:
“Is he dead?”
“Yes, he died a long time ago.”
“Did someone make him dead?”
“Yes, he was killed by a very bad person who did not like what Mr. King had to say.”
“Was it with a gun?”
The truth, why does it have to be so sad and so hard to explain?
Fast forward to this morning, Sofia climbed in bed with me while I was attempting to force my eyelids open and said:
“Today we need to remember that we are celebrating the birthday of Marther Luther The King Junior. He was a great man who did a lot of good things for our country and so now people with different skin color are the same.”
Pretty close, Kid. Pretty close.
If you have young ones, have you talked with them about Martin Luther King Jr? Would you have handled the conversation differently?
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